Bundarrah Days

Hymie Bracks is standing by the embattled MLA for Keilor, George Seitz, amid serious allegations of branch stacking, the buying up of ALP memberships and a possible police investigation.

In light of the revelations about Seitz and his activities over 24 years as a Member Of Parliament it seems extraordinary that the Premier would support him.

I hope that newly installed Opposition Leader, Ted Baillieu, pursues this and exposes any existing links between Hymie and Seitz's activities. It seems obvious that Hymie is not the least bit concerned about the buying up of ALP memberships, branch stacking and the rorting of the democratic process it entails.

Seitz could have provided the scandal required to bring down this circus.

On another matter I had a laugh when former Xavier college student, Attorney General Rob Hulls, called Ted Bailieu "The Toff from Toorak."

It costs a pretty penny to sit in the class room at Xavier. Obviously Mr Baillieu is not the only toff. As an ex Melbourne Grammar lad he shares his alma mater with two Bracks Government ministers, Twitter Thwaites and John Brumby.

All I can say to Rob Hulls is that if it comes down to a choice between the "toff" and the three stooges, my vote is with The Toff.

The Senate Environment, Communications, IT and The Arts Committee is conducting an inquiry into the management of Australia's National Parks.

I've been invited to give evidence to the committee at a hearing in Melbourne on June 5. I'll be allowed to make a three minute address in support of the submission I made to the inquiry and half an hour has been set aside for questioning by the senators.

Could be that the Senate is more interested in the efficient management of our National Parks than the Victorian Government.

I'll let you know what happens.

Which Is The Real Dan Brown? The slick fashion buff on the left or the worn old codger on the right? The Dan at left can be found at his official web site. The Dan at right is on his way to court. If you were Leonardo which one would you use as a model? They say the camera never lies and lots of people would have it that Dan Brown doesn't either. But someone's lying here. Will the real Dan Brown please stand up? The Dan on the right is the oldest 41 year old I've seen in a while. Funny thing is, though, he reminds me of one of those trendy priests you see on chat shows occasionally. They try to get the look but the look doesn't quite get them. Nevertheless, Dan Brown definitely has that clerical look about him. And for a budding billionaire, it looks like he intends to get as much wear as he can out of that black jumper.

We could be on to a conspiracy here. Maybe Dan Brown is really an Opus Dei numerary, has taken a vow of poverty and the loot from the code is headed for the Vatican coffers.

And here's another to ponder!

Could it be that the truth about Dan and his Da Vinci Code is about to explode worldwide? Could the novel merely be a cover for an incredible, unbelievable plot to usher in the Second Coming?

What if the real plan centres on Rosslyn in Scotland, home of Rosslyn Chapel, which, as nearly everyone knows by now, features prominently in Dan Brown's book. Did you know that Rosslyn is also the home of the institute which cloned Dolly the lamb, the world's first cloned animal?

What if the Rosslyn Institute is, in fact, home to a sinister conspiracy and Dan Brown is in cahoots with those behind it? Does anyone who thinks really believe it was a coincidence that the first cloned animal was a lamb? Not on your life. Dolly is the key to cracking the code of a true to life plot.

Be warned. It could be that in the near future an attempt will be made by operatives of the Priory Of Sion, of which Dan Brown might be a clandestine member (that would explain the clerical look), to steal the Shroud of Turin. The good oil is that the shroud will be taken secretly to Rosslyn where scientists will try to extract DNA for cloning. Should they be successful the resultant child will be handed into the care of the members of the Priory Of Sion to be revealed to the world at a time of their choosing. Thus will the Merovingian line be restored to power in France from whence it will emerge to conquer the world.

The reason Dan Brown is so keen to discredit the Catholic Prelature of Opus Dei is due to a little known prophecy by an obscure medieval saint, Theodore of Douay. Theodore prophesised this looming attempt to usher in the Second Coming by false means and wrote that it would be thwarted by "God's Work." That is the literal translation of Opus Dei.

Sound plausible? Well, there really and truly is a Rosslyn Institute that cloned Dolly the lamb, there really is a Shroud Of Turin and there are probably people in this world mad enough to contemplate an attempt to extract DNA from the shroud.

In contrast there has never been an historical secret society known as The Priory Of Sion, that was established as a con years ago. The renegade priest, Francois Sauniere, didn't discover a hidden treasure and trove of priory documents at Rennes le Chateau that made him rich - the sad fact is that he was trafficking in masses. Mary Magdalene's mortal remains are not in Scotland because they're in France, as every good Frenchman knows. That's why theologians, historians and academics the world over are lining up for a shot at Dan Brown.

Here's a man who thinks the Emperor Constantine edited scripture and made Jesus a divinity, who thinks that Leonardo inserted Mary Magdalene into his painting of The Last Supper in place of John The Apostle, who thinks she is a Goddess symbolising the "divine feminine" and that the Immaculate Conception refers to the conception of Jesus. History rebukes him.

Constantine didn't make Christianity the state religion of the Roman Empire. The Edict of Milan legalised freedom of worship for all religions.

And what about Leonardo (of Vinci), the alleged secret cultist. In the last days before he died Leonardo wrote his will and arranged for three masses to be said on his behalf after his death. But, if he was Grand Master of the Priory Of Sion and a closet goddess worshipper why would he request masses and why would he want to die with the last Sacraments of the Catholic Church? I s'pose, if he was the flamboyant homosexual Dan Brown says he was, he finally decided he mightn't have much luck with a goddess. The truth about Leonardo is, however, that he didn't approve of sexual activity of any persuasion.

As far as Jesus is concerned, if He was a mere man as Dan asserts why is He important anyway? Who cares about His offspring? I'm sure there are still descendents of Jonah running around somewhere and they're probably having a whale of a time. No doubt Paul Watson, co-founder of Greenpeace, is one of them.

And where does Mary Magdalene get her Goddess status? After all, if she was only the wife of an itinerant Jewish preacher who was executed for having a bit too much to say and if He wasn't divine, where does her divine femininity originate?

Is there a Da Vinci Code or only a Da Vinci joke? If it's the latter then the joke is on those who bought the book to get in the know because they thought there might be a real secret they ought to be let in on?

I'd say Dan Brown thanks them all - being the only man in history on the threshold of billionairedom due either to his appalling ignorance of history or his flirtation with divine femininity. Let's face it, most blokes fork out a fortune to flirt with a divine female. First, they need the sporty coupe to create the right impression, then a fat wallet to tip the waiters at the swishest restaurants. Danny Boy avoided all that.

But, what goes around comes around and some day it will be time for Dan to pay the piper.

"Oh Danny Boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling...."

Ever experienced a startling coincidence that makes you ask....what the....?

I had one yesterday. I'd just spent a couple of hours writing a piece entitled "Oh Danny Boy" for BNN on the subject of Dan Brown and his Da Vinci Code. The story is up on the BNN site now.

A couple of hours later I received an email enquiring about trail rides. It was from, would you believe, a Daniel Brown.

Of course I thought some wacker had read the BNN yarn and was having me on, but then I noticed Daniel had provided a phone number for me to answer his enquiry. So I rang him back, gave him the info and told him about the coincidence.

"Oh, people are hanging it on me about my name all the time nowadays, " he said.

I just asked him to be a bit more judicious about timing his enquiries in future.

The Treasure family, an pioneering Victorian High Country family, drove cattle
into the Alpine National Park on the Dargo High Plains today as a protest
against the cancellation of their high country grazing licences.

The President of the Mountain Cattlemen’s Association of Victoria, Doug
Treasure, said the protest has been strongly supported by mountain cattlemen all round
the high country.

He responded to suggestions that the family had been compensated
by saying that any money just covered short-term transitional expenses.

"Nothing can adequately compensate mountain cattlemen for the way we have
been treated," he said.

Doug Treasure said, “The protest highlights my family's fear that country
which has been in our care for 125 years will be devastated due to the
Government's decision to ban grazing. The blanket ban does not take into
account different land management needs of various High Country areas.

"Our cattle run sits 1000 feet below areas such as Bogong and is made up of
sturdy basalt country that is below the tree line, yet the Bracks'
government is treating all high country regions the same – this is not good
land management practice.

"We're taking the personal risk of putting the cattle back out onto our
former runs because we know our mountain spurs and gullies will suffer the
same fate as other Victorian weed infested and charred National Parks. The
ban has been a political decision, not an environmental one and we're
grieving for the future of our mountains. "

Mr Treasure said his family was investigating Tasmanian Government
legislation which deems cattle grazing as an integral part of the
management
of sensitive Parks areas, such as the delicate coastal areas of Tasmania's
Arthur Pieman River and the world famous Cradle Mountain area.

"The Tasmanian Parks and Wildlife quotes science that shows grazing makes
sense. Parks management enlists the help of cattlemen to graze the Parks,
not because of traditional practice, but because it benefits the land and
it
is the most economical way of management.

"Cattle will this year graze the pristine Cradle Mountain Park because it
increases diversity of plant species and reduces the fuel load for fires.
In
their studies they've found that areas periodically grazed carried 240
native plant species including wild flowers, versus areas restricted from
grazing which had less than half that number.

"The Tasmanian system is also based on local people managing the areas
they
know and have a lifelong vested interest in. The committees are made up of
representatives from each user group so that the best interests of the land
is upheld."

Mr Treasure said the Tasmanian system advocates grazing and is documented
within the Arthur Pieman Conservation Management Plan. This plan has been
legislated by Tasmanian Parliament and has worked on both a community and
environmental level for years.

"We are calling for the same sensible structure in Victoria. And that's why
we have taken cattle into our formerly grazed areas. We have to maintain
this link, not for the sake of our economics, but for the sake of our land.
If Parks Victoria were progressive, they would enrol our skills to help in
land management including advice on cool fuel reductions burns."

Doug Treasure's daughter-in-law and best selling novelist, Rachael Treasure
said city-centric decision making had devastated the Dargo High Plains
area.

She said, because cattlemen had been banned by bureaucracy from traditional
fuel reduction burns for 30 years the 2003 fires decimated the Park area to
the point where many areas will never regain its original bio-diversity.

"This ‘top-down’ land management regime by the Department is not working.
Land management decisions should be bolstered by the knowledge of well
informed locals such as the process used in Tasmania," Mrs Treasure said.

"I was on the ride in January when the MCAV took cattle into the
Wonnangatta
National Park as a protest. I was horrified to see Parks had allowed
thousands of hectares to become choked with weeds and the area carrying a
massive fuel load.

"Our family know that our treasured Long Spur, Kings Spur, Lanky's and Omeo
Plain where we ran cattle will suffer the same fate.

"It's clear our family and other cattlemen have been picked off as a
minority group and held up as an environmental evil. In reality it is the
opposite – we're protesting because the environment will suffer if our
family and our cattle are taken away.

"It's devastating because we could have a system like the Tasmanian one
where Parks Victoria see us as allies and they can enlist us in helping
both
the environment and boosting the tourist dollar."

"It's crippling to think my husband John, who grew up on those mountains
won't be able to show his kids or any other Australian where Angus
McMillan,
discoverer of Gippsland, blazed a tree to make a trail or where the best
orchids grow.

"And now there'll be no reason to saddle up a horse, put on a backpack of
spray and go down into the gullies to fight the weeds.

"We'll have to leave it up to the Parks Victoria employees who don't spray
further than the reach of their 4WD vehicle's hose or further than the
meagre weed control funding they get. It would be nice to think we will
still be around to help them out and show them where all the trails once
were."

NOTE: The Maguire and Connley families of the Southern Bogong High Plains have not accepted any compensation from the Victorian Government over alpine grazing and will not do so in the future. Nor do we accept that our licence areas are gone.

It's been a while since I posted anything. Sorry about that. Life gets busy sometimes and important things get neglected in the rush to catch up with the mundane.

Today the Treasure Family of Dargo are taking cattle back into the Alpine National Park as a protest against Steve (Hymie) Bracks and Twitter Thwaites.

I wish them the best of luck and would have been there to support them if my new vehicle wasn't away being roadworthied.

Five generations of the Treasure Family have grazed the Dargo High Plains and they have a heritage to defend. I 'spose we'll hear Hymie and Twitter tut tutting at some stage this afternoon and then no more.

By the way, Hymie, is that character from Get Smart. Mr Bracks is a dead ringer for him.